LIFE FLOWS ON........

Flow of life does not stop. Many a times I have witnessed the flowing water standing on the bank of the Ganges at my favorite place SWARGASHRAM. I compared its similarity with that of flow of life. The ever flowing water does not stop till it meets the sea. So is life. And with this we go on ageing. That’s the first instance where we see the ever going changes all around. I have on my table two sets of photographs with dear Raman, one during our staying in hostel in 1962 and other during my first visit to US taken in New York in 1973. And here I am. What a drastic change in appearance. With severe physical transformation in spite, the mental status and thoughts count the most. We give undue emphasis on looking much younger than our years whereas maturing gracefully and accepting it sportingly is the right approach as suggested by dear Sangeet. Age is in mind. It’s the spirit that counts. One can be 60 plus, yet exuberant and young at heart. After a long silence, I am again here to pen down my memories of little recent past so as to close down one mission of submission about me and my insignificant life .Thereafter I must evaluate the purpose of writing and its necessity or usefulness before taking a decision on its fate. I need to have a clearly defined sense of purpose. It might have different purpose when this exercise began and subsequently it might not have any useful purpose. Its fate hangs on my evaluation of both situations. Well, that is to be considered later on. Flow of life brings change. And the only constant in this world is change. No one can escape change. What I have `dealt with so far is changing situation surrounding me and its impact on me and my attitude towards life. It has been more than a year that I discontinued writing. Obviously things have changed in between. And will keep on changing. I pass and will keep on passing and flowing through those changes. There is difference between knowing the path and walking over the path. Life is not easy. It is packed with challenges of facing the changes. I would therefore focus on some changes around in my concluding chapter. So far in my life, I have spent 16 years at home growing up and schooling, 3 years in hostel away from home for graduation, next 25 years managing family business and wealth and experimenting and exploring little diversification in business along with trying to provide proper caring to elders and bringing up children. Next 6 years focus on change of place and business and marriage of both my wards. And last 10 years spent in witnessing growth of business through Sandeep’s hard work. That summed up 60 years of my life. I was into details of my 2nd tour of US. ON 15th July 2004, I had received some unexpected sms from some unknown person while traveling in US. Soon we returned back home. Perhaps on 30th July, I received a sms from same Mamta enquiring about me. It made me a bit excited that I was still in her mind. I instantly replied that destiny suggested us to be in friendly contact without caring for any other aspect. Still she insisted to know where about of me. I could understand hesitation on her part and confusion prevailing in her mind. I was also eager to know about her and how come she sent those sms to me. So I made a call to her instead of sending sms. I was delighted to hear her indifferent voice on the other side. I suggested her to enjoy thrill of unidentified intimacy in between. But she wanted to make sure if I was a known person to her or her family. So she first let me know that she just completed interior designing from Pune and presently she was with her parents and grandparents in Satara near pune. I informed her of my belonging to Faridabad. I also informed her that one of my hosts in US was from Satara. That made her more confused. That day she was trying to contact her friend Sandeep bahety in Bangalore when she got my sms in reply instead. She had no clue how it happened. I suggested her not to penetrate more into each other’s where abouts and let destiny take care of it. She too agreed to build up our contacts through mails, sms etc. I invited her to come down to Faridabad conveniently as she had not visited north India earlier. Thus our contact began through inspiring and intimate messages and talk over phone at times. Soon I left for Purulia and gave her my new cell number. But we were out of touch for some days. Pratibha, Shobha’s younger sister came there to see us after our US trip. While sharing about our tour, we narrated her about Mamta episode. Guessing through her cell number she was almost sure that she must be Mamta Navandar, a very close friend of Shikha. Pratibha met her recently in Pune. Jokingly she informed that my unknown friend was attractive and nice girl, if her guess was correct. I instantly called Mamta to let her know what I knew about her and her closest friend Shikha. She could understand that somehow her family background was known to me. Though we continued with our contact, some kind of reservation and hasitation was there at her end. I got confirmation from Shikha about her with a request not to disclose my identity for sometime. But Mamta could make a link with Shikha ,Purulia and Faridabad. Meanwhile Bharat came from US and was to go to Pune and Satara. So I sent some chocolates for Mamta. I talked with her thereafter. She was a bit confused still. She hoped me to be Sandeep. But later knowing my identity, she was shocked. I became MASAJI instantly as I am Shikha’s Masaji. But she assured to be in friendly contact for good. We would share family talk thereafter about her project and further studies. Her family was in search of a suitable match for her. During such conversation she informed me of her willingness to go abroad. Thus a friendly and family relationship started blossoming. But this unexpected development happened because Shikha was closely related to me. Though it is still a mystery how come she did send first sms to me by default? Shikha was studying at Pune but I did not have any contact with her. We came in contact through internet about two years back. I did not remember meeting her earlier though she informed about her visit to Faridabad on our house warming celebration. I invited to visit us sometime. ‘Find a suitable match for me and I would be there’ she replied. She mailed her photograph for me to recognize. Gradually we developed some liking for each other perhaps because of our straight forward approach. Then Mamta episode became instrumental in bringing her closer. Shikha was doing graduation and fashion designing at Pune when we came in contact first. Besides, she had done one year’s diploma in graphology. She appeared to be very hard working and self made person with lot of self confidence. After graduation she adopted fashion designing as profession while doing post graduation. I had an opportunity to meet her at Nagpur before my US trip. She was considerably over weight and careless about her out fits, which we did not appreciate. Thereafter I used to remind her for this lacking in her personality. After about a year, we again met at Nagpur. We were in very regular and intimate contact during this period. We had good time at Nagpur with some friendly and frank interaction about each other. I invited her to join us to travel to Purulia from Nagpur and stay with us there for sometime. And against all odds, she came to Purulia with us without any prior program and preparation. We appreciated her action as great guesture and consideration. We were delighted to have her with us for ten days in Purulia. Our effort was to impress upon her to take care of her over weight problem on priority. She was provided with very simple food there and regular exercise and pranayam was a must for her. She lost some weight there and promised to be very regular in putting up those efforts. It reflected during her stay that she had some special regards for us. She appeared to be person of determination but at the same time very flexible to be adjusted to any circumstances. We on our part took full care to make her cheerful through out. We kept her engaged with some or other purposeful activities. She had lived long hostel life away from family and now we `wanted her to get settled in life socially and family wise too in disciplined way. She followed our instructions and suggested routine with full devotion and sincerity. She would get up quite early in morning with us, follow us to roof top for pigeon feeding and return back after regular exercise and pranayam. In evening we would go to places of interest around and sometimes to our friends and relatives. Her friends from Pune and particularly Mamta from Satara were constantly in touch with her. I accompanied her up to Calcutta to leave her at Sangeet’s place enroute to Amraoti and back to Pune. We interacted a lot during Purulia –Calcutta journey about ourselves and that made us very close. In between Mamta got engaged with a London based boy. She assured me to come down to Faridabad to invite me in person and I assured to attend her marriage if she invites in person. We are yet to meet. I may like to add to this chapter about future development in this some how typical relationship. I close now with two inspiring sms that I received from Mamta and shikha in course of this relationship….. Dost wo jo dostana jane, dost ka har raj chhupana jane, Muskilo me kam ana jane, aur umra bhar nibhana jane. Alone when I open my palms and look at cris crossing lines, I always think which one of the lines made me so lucky that I have got such wonderful PAL LIKE YOU. Since my last write up, I had been to PURULIA, my native place, twice. I try to go around the town during visit. . It has changed a lot in recent time. Old houses are being rebuilt and repaired, new colonies are coming up, many new markets and showrooms have come up, road condition got improved, and power position is satisfactory. The famous Saheb band lake got face lift, cleaned, paddle boating facility provided and pink lotus blossom all over. A few industries have also come up. Better medical facilities are available now, though for specialized and advance treatment, one has to go out side. Rail and road communication have improved a lot. Almost all mobile services are available and its growth is remarkable. Though some good schools have come up, facilities for higher education are almost none existing. I along with Raman happened to visit J K College at the beginning of the year where we both studied for a year in 1960/61. There has been some significant development in the campus. Post graduation in Mathematics is available there now. We visited our old class rooms too and were sentimentally moved with old memories. During last two visits, I had been through outskirts of Purulia and changes of growth is visible with new construction all over .But our own locality looks to be static. And our house adds to the miserable plight of the locality .It needs repair, coloring and face lift. 2006 was fixed up a target year to complete our transition to Faridabad .And it is almost done but all of a sudden I changed my idea of selling of our residential house for the time being, I want to keep Purulia link stand by for some more years till Sameep be in a position to take decision regarding it in consultation with Sandeep. We have lost intimate links with Janglu, Deshnok and Bikaner by not keeping any property there. Let us not repeat the same in Purulia case. I am still a member of Rotary club of Purulia. And during my two visits, I was delighted to see the extension of services through Rotary service centre and other activities. Our investment in the youth of community through Rotaract movement has started paying dividends. Yesterday’s Rotaract leaders have taken over Rotary leadership and hence the grand performance. But it’s unfortunate that the Rotaract Club of Purulia stopped functioning. Once it had given Rotaract leader like Sandeep and in 2004, I had witnessed their silver jubilee celebrations promising a very bright and dedicated future .But that was not to be. Another disappointment was to see withdrawal of some recently introduced social and charitable activities at our family Dhramsala, due to some misunderstanding and disinterest on the part of our family members in general. Hope things to improve soon. Nandu and Narain, my childhood mates died earlier .Babloo with whom I had developed intimate friendly contact through Rotary died recently. Kanhaiya and Jiwan, my cousins are also not in pink of health. But some of young generations are doing exceedingly good in studies. Sidharth and Pankaj are in USA. Gunjan got selected for BITS. Minoo is doing MBA. Harsh and Nikunj are expected to perform satisfactorily Madhur and Chhotu completed MBA. A very positive trend coming up in Mall family to make us feel satisfied. Though our transition to Faridabad is almost complete, our interest and attachment with Purulia will remain for many years to come. Swargashram is another place; I am linked to since many years. Its natural surrounding on the bank of holy Ganges and at the foot hills of Himalayas, has always been of great attraction .Besides, preaching of swamiji has given a distinct and positive direction to my thinking. In last July, swamiji took last breath. He was hundred plus .After his death, we visited Swargashram in October. The Ganges and surrounding tranquility was as usual, but vacuum created after swamiji’s death was unbearable. Geetabhawan looked so deserted that even Sameep was shocked .We spent a few minutes in front of his seat, from where he used to interact with the audience during regular satsang and prayer thrice every day for more than fifty years. Though frequency and duration of our visit is sure to come down, we would try to visit the place once in a year at least to rededicate ourselves to the direction inspired by him to follow. Sameep again went there for a few hours while going to Badrinath and Kedarnath with Sandeep and team .Since his return, he is insisting me to take him there during vacation as early as possible. Hope he will keep this link alive. Faridabad is now our home town, where recent history of our family is being written. Since our arrival, it has changed a lot. In last two years, it’s also getting face lift. Roads are being repaired and parks are being developed and maintained. A few malls have come up and many are under construction .Many new sectors are being developed. Industrial activities have gone up. We too have taken up expansion. More machines are being added to our machine shop and heat treatment plant is being installed .Some industrial and residential properties have been purchased. Home is being refurnished. Pooja room has been rebuilt and furnished nicely. Our house has been constructed within last nine years in segments. It might have many shortcomings with our old Purulian vision and attitude at the time of initial construction and hence the need of fresh dressing for more comfort and luxury. It provides Minoo an interesting engagement and self confidence of performing perhaps .But soon, we should pause to give some thinking as to where it leads to and at what cost. Consolidation of achievement and redefining of what we actually desire to achieve, is a must in between. With construction of house, Goura and family are almost well settled here. It’s most remarkable that they could come over here and get settled so nicely and within so short time. Champu and Dinu are here for study purpose since a few years. Last year they have put up a small engineering unit. So hopefully one of them is likely to settle here gradually. These developments add pleasure to living here…And happiness is the best facelift in life. Today is 11th September 2006.The world is mourning the terrorist attack on world trade towers in NewYork. All headlines in TV or Newspaper have highlighted it. It took me to my visit to the place. I had been to the site thrice. First visit was immediately after its construction in 1973. My second visit was in 2004, when I took a bus tour of all important places of interest in New York. I had never thought to be there again. In fact I had no reasons to think of another visit to USA. Meanwhile Sumant and Sangeet shifted to USA. Sangeet wanted us to be there once as we could not visit her during her last stay there. So we arrived there on 2nd of May, 2006. With not that comfortable journey last time, we preferred a day journey all along. We landed at New York around 11 pm via London .It was a very smooth and comfortable journey with good vegetarian food served in between. The excitement and happiness on the face of Sangeet there around will always inspire us to take up such journey any time. Soon we were at her cozy apartment. And before entering into the campus, I was delighted to see the skyline of New York from there. We felt very homely with Sangeet and Sumant around. Next morning, Sumant went to his work and we went for a walk to see the locality. We were enchanted with its location and beauty .It was green all over and tulips of various colors blossoming as the day advances. I had never seen so many varieties of tulips blossoming along walking track. It was my third visit to New York, but it never looked so beautiful. In fact it was my maiden view of New York from this side of Hudson. It became my routine to walk on the woodwork along Hudson in the morning and again late in night. Small boats and sometime big ship passed through on the Hudson having Manhattan in the background. I liked Sangeet’s cozy apartment and its situation so much that I wanted to spend whole of my stay there around enjoying its beauty. This visit was to enjoy Sangeet Sumant’s company and to see how comfortably they were settled there .And we were fully satisfied with their acquaintances, contacts, living and jobs. As we had seen and traveled through many parts of US in our last two visits, we intended to spend our stay very homely with them. But Raman wanted to take us to Las Vegas for showing Shobha its unique entertaining standing and Sangeet planned to take us to Boston where she had spent many years earlier. So we flew into Las Vegas with Raman and Bhabhi and stayed there for three good days. It has transformed into a new Las Vegas since I visited some three decay earlier. No doubt it has its own charm and attraction. Even without gambling, which we don’t do, it offers unique tourist attractions. We could see the replica of Venice, New York Middle East etc including their skyline, thunder and rains. We went to Wooller dam also. We saw some very popular show such as MAMA MIA. On the whole it was a different experience. We could have enjoyed it more if visited in younger age. Before going to Las Vegas, we traveled to Sayre for one night and also spent a few hours at Sidhanchal. Sangeet was delighted to have Raman and Bhabhi stayed for two nights at her place. On way to Sayre, we spent a few hours with Ramesh, my cousin. We were with him for three days during our last visit in 2004.He lives with his wife and two daughters. He has a huge and beautiful house. With both daughters shifting to hostel, he was thinking to shift to a smaller house .Earlier we went for dinner at Sujata’s residence. She was Sangeet’s class mate at Nistarini College, Purulia. During last trip, we did not go to her place as she had gone to India. Both Ramesh and Sujata are happily settled in US for good Sangeet had stayed for more than three years at Boston. She did her graduation there. And so she had valid reasons to take us there .Boston is a very popular city and we had not visited it earlier. Sumant hired a car and he drove us through Boston. We were privileged to enjoy home hospitality at Sangeet’s friend Sangeeta and Mavlika for one night each. We got family treatment and felt very homely there. It rained throughout and we drove through Boston enjoying rains. It was all together a different experience driving through the green .It was so thrilling for Sangeet and Sumant to reinvest into the sweet memories of their stay in Boston. We drove through the places where they used to reside and work. The excitement on Sangeet’s face is still refreshing when we visited the college from where she did her graduation. In spite of rain, we took Sangeet’s snap with college in background. With very little change in Sangeet, she looked like a student still. On way back we stayed for sometime in Rod Islands and visited some old villas owned by rich and famous people of those times. It was interesting to see those historical places .We had dinner with Shipra and family and returned back to Sangeet’s residence on Hudson in New York. We had few days left over. We did not have specific plans as it was third visit to New York. We did some shopping. .It was so convenient to shop in the near by Malls and stores .We visited the massive Macy store. It was worth a visit to believe its size and stock. We visited the famous Times Square to enjoy its splendid illumination in mid night .New York is a very vibrant city throughout day and night. My last day fixture was to have lunch with my cousin, Ramesh Mall’s family. We met many of Sangeet’s contacts. Two of my cousins, Mayank and Pankaj had earlier come to see us. We went to the famous World Trade Tower site once again where construction of four towers has begun. This was my third visit to the place. The first one in 1973 immediately after its construction, second one in 2004 after its fall and now when reconstruction work began. We also went up to the New York stock exchange though it was closed for Sunday. And that being the last day, we all four, went for a long walk along the Hudson bank till mid night reviewing our stay with them. Early next morning we were to leave. This visit had given us rare opportunity to be with Sangeet and Sumant for such a long time. Even Sangeet never stayed with us for such duration after marriage. It was a rewarding experience to be fully satisfied with. .Their’s is a small apartment but fully equipped with and location wise just superb. They live like friends taking care of each other nicely. Sumant is so caring to her, not only in house management .but in business too .He guided her to tie up with Anika, a dynamic lady. They are now partners and friends too. Their business is growing satisfactorily. .Almost five days in week they work together. And on week ends, Sumant is to take care of. On one raining day, Anika came all the way to see us and brought self cooked food for us .It was so refreshing to talk to her and reassuring about their taking care to each other. We are so satisfied with Sangeet’s acquaintances, living, routine, business, and taking care of in laws from there by taking half an hour daily sharing all. That’s why we are not worried on extension of their stay. Of course we wish them to come back soon considering family situation. We are proud of Sangeet for her standing and are thankful to Sumant for his unqualified support to her to stand with. 11/9 has other significance too. She joined our organization on this eventful day. And she became instrumental for these write ups. Some time last year after her re joining, during some interactions, I suggested her to find a match for her and get settled in life. She too thought that it was high time for that. I further suggested her to visit different matrimonial sites on internet for the purpose. I offered her to accompany, if needed along with Shobha to Times of India organized swambars for Bengali community. Within a few months, she informed about two proposals in consideration. One from US based boy and another from Bombay based. She was a bit more inclined towards former. I wanted her to go slow and collect all information very particularly about US proposal. Her relatives also preferred the Bombay proposal, which got through and ultimately she got married on 9th August.I along with Shobha and Sandeep attended the gracious ceremony. We are so satisfied to find the groom and family very matching. We wish her a very happy married life. Meanwhile, Mamta got married in November and Shikha got married in July. We are occasionally in contact. Both are reported to be very happily settled. It’s different kind of contacts with all three. I am yet to see Mamta. Our contact was through sms only. The other one worked with us for four years and some kind undefined intimate relationship did happen in between. Shikha is close relative, but we met on one or two occasions only .Our contacts was also through sms and on line chats. But one thing was common that their contact brought joy to life. It instilled enthusiasm that disregards success or failure. Joy emanates from our own actions, from what one feels deep down inside. I enjoyed the path while walking even if it did not reach the destination. Coming to the principal subject again that life flows on…….and with it come changes. Babuji is now 84. In 1999 he came here for good .He so kindly considered to leave Purulia to see that the family lives at one place. His associates and friends left behind. We seven constitute his company now. He used to come to our place of business at times. Every alternate day, he used to go to near by places by car to make up for absence of close company. Gradually he stopped coming to factory. He was not comfortable in Esteem so wagon R was bought considering height of its seat. But soon he had to discontinue as movement was not possible for health reason. Within last one year, things have changed a lot .Now he has to be confined within home. His legs don’t support the over weight body. To start with he took help of walker but now he has to move on wheel chair. This little movement is also hard to do. He needs support and assistance for bath etc. That made him reserved too. He talks very little now. His memory is also fading. His eye sights got weaken. Now he realizes the sufferings of being over weight But it’s too late .With practically nil movement, he is to gain more weight in spite of taking less food. He fell down five times during last few months. Fortunately it did not result into bone fracture. I take him to poojaroom on wheel chair and to the outer lobby in the evening. Otherwise he has to be on his bed except going to toilet for refreshing and bath. I could foresee that worst is yet to come. I had apprehension of this situation some thirty years back considering his over weight and food habits. I could not take proper action in time. I want to spend more time with him now, though he keeps silence. I try to take him to old days to discuss about his childhood. I want him to bring back his smile; I want him to share his thoughts about his life or his interest in life or about our ancestors and their activities. He is unable to penetrate through memories. After his bath, I comb his hairs everyday. And those are the most sentimental moments for me. This privilege will not last long, I apprehend. I have many thoughts coming in mind to ask him about. But I don’t dare to do that. I will not be able to check my sentiments before him. Even without being active, he has been the greatest support to me. That’s why my friends suggest me to be strong considering his health and my sentimental dependence on him. He is not in a position to put his signature. That compelled me to sell out the last property in his name in Purulia with his consent. His trust upon Almighty, provides the necessary strength to bear all this. He regularly reads one chapter of Geeta. I can feel his growing weakness everyday. But he does not make frequent disgusted complaint about it. Sometimes, he would say that his legs were very weak. We are in fact, not in a position to comfort him. Every one is bound to face the change causing by time. Bai has also become very weak these days. She is 77.In spite of general weakness and ageing, she maintains her routine and activities. She gets up at 3.30 in the morning. And till 9.30, she is engaged in yoga meditation, pooja and aarti. She takes intermediate rest to get recharged to keep her active. Occasionally she cooks various sweets. She prepares Aampapada during mango season to send to all near and dear. She goes to nearby temple everyday. She tries to go to the park for little walking. She frequently tries to go to Goura’s residence to meet the children. Her movement has been restricted because of Babuji’s health. For the first time, she could not visit Purulia during Guru Purnima . She plucks flowers from the garden and prepares garlands. She keeps some social touch with neighbors. She does vegetable and fruits purchasing for the family. She is `being missed the most at Purulia. As usual she prepared all the variety of sweets on the occasion of Krishna Janmastmi and she will do it again on annakoot. She is the key person in the family in spite of ageing and not so good health. She is always ready to go to park or temple or social gathering, if suitable company be there. She keeps contacts with relatives and friends through occasional phones. It’s the most pious time to be with her during Aarti. The whole family revolves around her. All feel cheerful to find her actively engaged. In recent years her appearance has changed a lot. All of a sudden ageing got reflected on her face but her grace remains intact. With Goura here, she finds a good `company besides Shobha trying to be supportive. With Babuji confined in home, she has to restrict her movement. She is still very creative, keeps herself engaged in innovations. She is symbol of traditional convention and caring. Shobha is 56 now. She recovered very nicely after operation and treatment. But she has been suffering with pain in joints since last two years. Her walking stamina has reduced. Pain persists all through. As side effect of medicine, she keeps on gaining weight, though she is `careful about diet .She does exercise regularly too. Still, ageing and a bit over weight with short height has its impact. She lost her father last year. That has negative impact sentimentally. She keeps on worrying about her mother. Our personal life got changed a lot after ailment. Perhaps that made me more caring towards her health. And except for some urgency such as her father’s demise, we remain and travel saath saath. One thing I am most happy about her is her followings and caring for Bai, her mother in law. She takes care of house hold work as usual with priority to assist mother particularly. Except family members she does not have any person of intimate contact here around, nor any kind of socialization as in Purulia. We go to see movie very selectively and that too three or four times in a year. We don’t go to restaurant of our own. But sometimes we do go in company with Sandeep and children. To break the monotonous routine, we try to have short trips: once in a year to Swargashram, once to Purulia and one pleasure trip to near by place. We went abroad twice in last two years and Kurukshetra last year. It was a long cherished desire to visit Kurukshetra, the place where Lord Krishna has taught the essence of life through Geeta. Bai was keen to go there, but she could not make it to be there as it was not proper to leave babuji alone over night here. Kurukshetra has history of more than 5000 years. So we expected to see many ruins or ancient monuments. On the contrary we found it to be a modern town where historical places have been recently renovated. The famous Brahmakund sarovar is very nicely maintained with bathing ghats all around. Lakhs of people take holy bath on solar eclipse day very comfortably. Kurukshetra festival was going on during our stay. Thousands of pilgrims thronged from near and far places for the festival. Never the less it was remarkably clean. Various cultural programs were organized on the occasion. The science museum, Sri Krishna museum depicting mahabharat era and Samadhi of late acting Prime Minister Guljarilal Nanda and Sekh Chilly’s Tomb are places of interest worth seeing. A few miles away there is the place where Krishna preached the holy Geeta. It’s being presented every evening lively through light and sound. Krishna being so close to every Indian, the feelings generated there, make us feel like party to the happenings some 5000 years ago. We were happy and satisfied to have Sameep with us but missed Divyansh .The green and spacious campus of Kurukshetra University is also worth visit. Considering Bai Babuji’s health, Shobha does not seem to be so interested in even short outings. Instead she prefers to go for evening walk or drive within the city for a change. Since two year, she tries to play on harmonium. Gradual improvisation is on card. More over it provides her a purpose and recreation. She tries to read out some inspiring write up out of some book to babuji, if he is interested in. We try to discuss our short comings sometime before retiring so as to get amended. She has stopped seeing TV serials .Of course she looks into news and sometime cricket. Recently, she tries to meditate. Now a day we discuss more frequently on improvising our own attitude and actions so as to make life more cheerful and purposeful. Her interest in shopping has considerably reduced. In fact, she was never fond of shopping. Her wardrobe has least stock. She would like to buy some little gift for all including servants and domestic helpers when ever we visit some place. I am confident and careful to make life more meaningful out of our relationship. At times she has to bear my harsh attitude. I had requested her in advance to be ready for such treatment .I would react to her only for any indifferent development in family. But soon the situation would cool down .The greatest of life’s pleasures are shared in between. We both understand and know that the time to trust is not just when all is calm. The most important time to trust is through the raging storm. She is not in pink of health. But she has the brevity to face the tough personal situation with smiles. She needs sharing of time with her siblings more now. But time has changed. Everyone has his own engagements as per priority. It’s to her credit that she has never been demanding on any account .And that has made her as well as others life comfortable. Now it’s our turn to make her relax and enjoy life. And for that, we all must keep in mind her health status while expecting her contribution .A smile on our face will do wonders, I understand. Smile is medicine for health and happiness. Sandeep is now forty. I often say that a person becomes naughty at forty. But Sandeep has little time to become naughty at forty. In fact he does not find spare time for his own hobby to develop. In last few years, he has grown up as a hard working and fully devoted business person. His business hour begins at 8 am and extends up to 8 in the evening. Of course he enjoys his business, he loves his expansion plan. But that debars him from many of supportive engagements. A day before, on 2nd October, inaugural poojan of his dream project has been performed. Though it will take another one month or so for the plant to be operational, it has added another feather to his successful career. I am confident and assured of more such laurels as rewards towards his sincere efforts. But I am unable to digest his single track life with no options for sports, music, socialization and time sharing with family and children. I advocate that there should be healthy balance between work, recreation and family. I understand that it is paramount for us to excel in our profession, but the question comes: at what cost? We should not forget that it is equally important that we invest proper time in things that we are passionate about. And I know his passions. He is keenly interested in music, sketching, playing tennis and table tennis, book readings and intimate family life. He has to be deprived of all these attachments. Once this expansion is over within a few months, he will have to amend his priorities. I have a mind to take care of it and enforce it .Simplicity is the best trait that we can have to achieve this. In addition, strengthening the core values and ethics will help a lot. Sandeep is, though very simple and straight forward, situation complexes due to some or other reasons at times. In fact, he has to carry on all responsibilities of his own. So he is over burdened. At times, things seem to be out of his control and mismanaged. That disturbs me and others but he never let his calmness go. He has been working very hard all these years. Though work is pleasure, he needs relaxation and recreation in between. And I have to take care of his routine. I have made him to learn synthesizer under a trainer since last two months. I remind him that all family members need to share time with him. Things would improve soon, I hope. Life is a mixed pair of opposites. High and low are interwoven. Money can buy pleasures, it can not buy happiness. Then happiness for the whole family originates from him. Now he is the key person, not only at the business but at home front also. This is the key consideration, he must keep in mind. He must take care of his health and mood and recreation in addition to be more caring to bai, babuji, Shobha and children. He should be careful to carry on and pass on the legacy of heritance with modernization. It has been around four years that I am involved in these write ups. On 28th of this month, I will be 61. Time is matured for me to complete this exercise. But it is a continuous process and can not be completed. So let it be an intermission cum end if I don’t write further. I feel that the more I write, my expression gets refined and distinct and language more refined and defined. At the same time, more I write the less I like the purpose of writing; and a fear comes up on me that these may not interest anyone and may even become a burden to preserve. Why then, I continued writing for so long? It’s a question to me which will remain unanswered .My kin and close one know about this venture. At times they enquire about its completion and the opportunity to go through it. I have no positive reply to it. But it is the joy of sharing with you all while I write that made me to continue with it. We are always inspired and interested to look outside around and inside into our self. Know thyself, is a challenging statement. And it has been achieved to some extent through this exercise. It has made me to look into the gallery of my life and heart and mind. It refreshes the pictures of persons, places and events that colored my views and feelings. I might have made mistakes while writing, many unimportant facts and happenings might have been highlighted in it. In fact it had never been a challenging life, neither any laudable achievement attached. Still, I could pen down so many pages reflecting many colors of a very ordinary life. I am not that young any more. In last four years since I started writing, I have come to a state of ageing fast. I have very little hairs left over on my scalp. Wrinkles have appeared on my face. And of late in last few months, I feel physical problems staging up; some of them of serious nature. When I need to be physically healthy to support my ailing parents, I myself feel to be let down. Though my food habits and daily routine are, I think, very balanced. As a baby, I had arrived with my shrill cries and as a man I shall depart from this world with unbroken silence. My book of life covering the period so far has been stable. It does not have many low or high, fulfillment or disappointment, triumph or tragedy, good health or sickness. It has been a great experiment and experience of living four generations together. For the intimate bonding in between, there remain considerations for each other that make life merry and smooth. Sometimes we become uncultured when we don’t be considerate to others but it lasts for a while only. So far all efforts have been directed to fulfill desires. Sometimes it got success and sometimes remained short off. Time has come for me to put all efforts to eliminate all desires instead. It is not an easy task, but an honest attempt should be taken towards it. I began with ‘TO REKINDLE THE SPARK WITHIN’, and has come to the end with ‘LIFE FLOWS ON ‘…but I am yet to rekindle the true spark within. It reminds me of two ancient stories. An ordinary person was rewarded to become king for one day. He very intelligently utilized one day’s power. He released coins in his name. He pronounced many welfare schemes. He utilized the day in such a way that his name got engraved permanently in the history. The second story refers to Parikshit, the last king in Yudhisthir’s dynasty. He could know that he would die within seven days. He utilized it so spiritually that he became fearless of death by the end of that week and was ready to welcome death gleefully. I don’t have the privilege to know how long I am to live, but it is sure to be less than what I expect. Still after more than sixty years of living, I don’t know how to utilize it in proper way. Last week, courtesy Sameep’s inspiration, I was in SWARGASHRAM for six days. On solitary moments and on the bank of Ganga, my thoughts pondered on those thoughts. I am still clueless. How best the remaining uncertain days of life be utilized to attain what aught to be attained. Perhaps my vision about what aught to be attained is still unclear but gradually coming up to surface. In last two years, I have read a few inspiring books. Some provided strong support during low moods, some focused on how to lead simply straight forward life, some on how and why India is coming up so strong economically with many adversaries around. It simply leads to awareness, awareness about my self. I need to know myself more. That will provide the foundation for me to best utilize the remaining life. In this context, it has been a rewarding experience. This document about me provides material condensed at one place. I could know more about me, my failure and achievement. I assess me as a person, who could not serve his country, community and family as he wanted to. I could not transfer what ever skills I have, to drive the best out of me. I may be disappointed at some point, but not disgusted. I might be harsh to some at some point under the influence of my idealism, but the harsh treatment was out of love only and not out of hatred or disrespect. Still, I seek pardon, if it hurts someone. And I am grateful to all concerned who inspired and influenced my life and subsequently helped creating this sum up of my life so far. To be specific, I am indebted to some of my teachers, my childhood friends, young mates, extended mates, my parents, my spouse and wards, which directly or indirectly made it possible to shape up my life and this work.