MY CHILDHOOD MATES

I don’t have a diary or record to gather all information that I want to include .I am to recollect all out of my memory. It might not be that easy to keep the sequence of happenings. It might appear like a scattered way of collecting facts of vital interest or sometime even of not that importance. It might touch your heart at times or might skip unnoticed. But for me, all little events or happenings would be very important to look into and share with as my life must have been built around them. To switch over from current affairs to childhood memories will not be that smooth, but situation demands it. It might be too late otherwise. I apprehend it not to be that pleasing also. But life has to be taken up as it comes. It is inevitable. God almost fulfills all the desires of His ward. So let we get prepared to tune to that music of life too which we might not like to listen considering it to be His desire. A little girl from neighbor and of course a distant relative too, was my first childhood mate. We were of same age of around 7/8 years. After school time, we used to spend good amount of time together. She used to be with me during my home tuition too. When we were around 10 years, she left for Calcutta for good. Yes I missed her a lot, but then got engaged with other companions, I presume. She returned when she was 14 and tried to meet me to revive the old friendship. She came for a week only. But I was so shy that avoided meeting her. She left with a note that next time if at all she did come, it would be after her marriage as early marriage was the system of those days. And next year I attended her marriage. Thereafter we might have met 2/3 times on different social occasions. And about 4/5 years back, I could know that she was suffering with cancer .On shobha’s insistence, we both went to meet her and thereafter within two months, she took her journey to abode. I could just pray for the peace of the soul. Around same period, my cousin, Nandu was my other intimate friend. We would go to school together and visit each other’s place daily. He was only 10 days elder to me. Then he went for a good school away to Madras .He returned after doing matriculation, became very smart in city life. He got admission at Calcutta, but could not adjust there and discontinued studies after intermediate. We enjoyed maiden trip to a hill station Mussorie for ten days in 1961.He could enjoy more as he was smart, could mix up with young crowd from Delhi and I as per my shy nature used to enjoy natural beauties of that beautiful station, which is still my favorite place. Thereafter I went to Ranchi for studies. We would meet whenever I came to Purulia. He later on had hard time to settle in business .We had been closely associated, but never to that depth that can be termed as friendship .But it is certainly a very intimate family contact. We had pleasant trip to different places like Ranchi, Calcutta, Rajgir, Tata etc. Without informing about our trip, once we went to Calcutta for enjoying a movie. There are many such sweet memories .Last year when I met him, he was restless and was afraid of serious illness .He was addicted to Panparag with tabacco.I suggested him many changes in food habits, but it was too late. And soon he was detected malignanat. On my request he came to Faridabad and after check up, our Doctor let me know that his life span can not be prolonged beyond two years. And now he is counting his days. Last week I rushed to meet him at Calcutta and so long I was with him, he was very cheerful to surprise even his wife and son .But I had to return back after spending a few hours with him in hospital. For those three hours he forgot the pain of cancer. We talked on very light matters and I very frankly told his wife and son to be prepared for the inevitable which was not far away .I still hope to meet him at Purulia next week and wish to spend some time with him When last time, in July I was in Purulia, Nandu used to meet me every morning. He was losing weight regularly. I asked him to go for a check up. He was frightened with chances of any adverse outcome. He would get out of office feeling suffocation and wanted to stop my conversation on ill health. I returned to Faridabad. Soon he was detected for cancer at an advanced stage. Whenever I used to come to Purulia and if some death occurred in our contacts during my stay, he used to say that it was a routine during my stay over. I am afraid of it this time when I expect to see him here ailing seriously. If something happens to him as his days are numbered, I might blame my self. So I feel to cut short my visit this time. I can’t face the situation This time my Purulia visit was not that fruitful so far pre determined purpose was concerned. I spenttime in meeting friends and relatives, seeing movies, writing mails and of course to be with my ailing friend Nandu .He felt quite comfortable with me around. His wife, son and daughter also confirmed the same. He tried to follow what suggestion I put forward .He took me to Gourinathdham, a popular Shiwtemple, which I visited after forty years .One day he requested me to phone him daily from Faridabad as he felt that would ease his sufferings for some time. And when I was about to leave, he asked ”Main Thik Ho Jaungana,Sach Sach Batao”.Oh, I was shaken by that question. What a trust he had developed upon me. What’s the peach of agony he was suffering within apprehending the out come .I again sat down near him for more than an hour to talk all about life and its ultimate fate? It reminded me of a similar talk we had in between me, my late friend Bissu and Biren sometime 14 years ago at Chabi biri garden. Peeping into my life so far, I told them that I had lived a full life ,got tremendous love, affection and regards ,rarely received by many ,from parents, children ,friends old or young, society, Rotarians and from all the people with whom I happened to be in contact.. So if death comes suddenly, I was ready to welcome .If God wanted to get me back tomorrow, I would like to make it today to be at one with his desire. I asked the same question to Nandu, assuring that he would be alright. But suppose God needed him, why to be afraid of death? Let us not afraid of our death. Let people be afraid of our death. So be prepared strongly to act on His signal .I know it is easier said than done. If some courage comes up within him to face the reality with brevity, my out speaking would be timely I returned back to Faridabad with hopes out of hopeless situation to see him again. About three /four months later, he was moved to Calcutta. His younger brother’s son was to get married. All family members including his parents were there around. We too went there to attend the marriage with an opportunity to see ailing Nandu. We were with him in the hospital for most of the time escaping out of marriage. He was not comfortable even to open his eyes or to talk. His parents were placed into a fix. Physically they were present in marriage but sentimentally with ailing son having very limited life. Me and Shobha spent good amount of time with him during our two day’s stay over there. Then we went to Mayapur to see Iscon temple .We returned after two days to find Nandu in I C U. I went to see him there. He did not open his eyes He was restless .He could recognize my call but could not respond to it. I could for see the inevitable. We returned to Faridabad in the evening. He was put on ventilators for next three days. And then on one after noon I received a call .His father was on other side to inform me that it was all over. Life is so fluid. The way we think it is going to unfold is not the way it is going to unfold. Lesson of life is simply to accept that it is `all a mystery. Let us learn to let it go. SHIWJI…..though three years elder to me, is the most intimate child hood mate. Though living next door, we were not in close touch to start with, perhaps as he was senior. But destiny made him my closest child hood mate. I happened to go to Haridwar and Swargashram along with my grandmother when I was 8 years old. It was a happy coincidence that he was also there with his father. That brought us together for staying in the lonely and natural environment of Swargashram on the bank of the Ganges. It was in the year 1952. Swargashram was a very deserted place with thick forest and the Ganges flowing near by. We used to roam around together with no other activities there around. An intimate bond of relationship developed between us and that continues still. I found him always by my side at all the time since then. Although he had to struggle throughout as a student or later in business, I found his helping hands as a friend around me. It is just out of world to have a friend like him. No quarrel, no difference, no expectations were there from his side during 55 years of our contact. It is one sided help and love that I have received from him. To be frank, I have done nothing for him, even when he needed the most. He knows me more than what I know myself. He knows everything or more what I am to write here. We have a very transparent relation since childhood. I have great regards for him, not only as friend but as a person. He was never good in studies. He could not continue his studies beyond I.Com. He was not successful in business too. He got uprooted from Purulia to Bikaner, back to Purulia and now ultimately settled in Jaipur. We used to pass hours together standing in the corner of our street. He accompanied me on to many small visits to different places of interest near by. I always looked towards him for company, help and assistance. Whether it is for morning or evening walk, social or religious functions, gardening, outings, marriage ceremonies, college and intimate affairs, movie going, picnic or whatever I name and he bestowed it with full devotion and sincerity. I was totally dependent on him for all work and assignment during my marriage to Sangeet’s marriage and in between Goura’s and Sandeep’s marriage. He was always by my side whenever I was emotionally down. Even without many words or resource, he was source of strength to me. He was here last week and as usual I opened my state of mind before him. He never took me otherwise or misunderstood me. I owe to him a lot and would cherish for his friendship and co -operation and above all trust for ever. Let God alone be by his side as he would never like to take anyone’s help. Where ever he be , he is very popular because of his simplicity and helping nature. In Purulia, even the street labors and ricksaw pullers miss him. Whenever he is there, they would never miss to meet him and he too reciprocates gleefully. He was never in comfortable position financially. He could make himself a bit stable very late in life. But he always supported me for my little needs in early days. He never allowed me to pay for movie tickets or at restaurant, tea stalls or even at Paan ki dukan. At times he had to borrow money from others to make these payments, I remember. In fact, he spoiled me so much by his support that I never dare to pay for any such thing in his presence still. He always believes in giving. Since many years, we live apart He is in Jaipur and I am at Faridabad. But we have the same tuning still in between us. We meet occasionally now but we share every thing with same intimacy and trust. We have the same love, affection, trust and caring in between.